Thursday, July 2, 2015

EXCLUSIVE: A First Look at Netflix's Fuller House
Score Technician: Joe Hemmerling

Hey, aging millennials, who's stoked about the upcoming Netflix reboot of our fave family sitcom Full House? The nanobots sure are! That's why, ever since the series was announced, they've been combing the internet for any scrap of information they could find on what DJ, her sisters, and her wacky uncles have been up to (We all know how Bob Saget has kept busy). Well, good news for them (and you, loyal Scorehards): We've just obtained EXCLUSIVE access to a scene from the shooting script for the upcoming pilot. As you've surely heard by now, the series will follow a newly widowed DJ Tanner, mother of two with her third on the way, as she seeks help from her sister Stephanie and her best friend Kimmy to get through a trying time. Sounds like there will be plenty of feels along with all the laughs!

So, without further ado, let's take a peek at what the Tanners will be up to in 2016.

INT - The living room of a moderately sized home in San Francisco.

It's morning, but the room itself is pitch black. The lights are off, the curtains drawn. Slouched in a recliner is DJ TANNER, 6 months pregnant. In her left hand is a bottle cheap whiskey; in her right hand, a cigarette smoked nearly to the filter. She stubs the smoldering cigarette out in an ashtray overflowing with butts and picks up a revolver sitting next to it.

Is today the day, old friend?

DJ pops open the cylinder to verify that it contains a single bullet. In a fluid, practiced motion, she spins the cylinder and snaps it shut. Pushing the revolver to her temple, she squeezes her eyes shut and draws back the hammer.

Time to find out.

Inhaling sharply, DJ pulls the trigger. The hammer falls on an empty chamber with click. DJ's eyes snap open, sadness and relief warring across her features.

DJ picks up a hinged double frame containing two pictures. On the left side is a photo of a woman in her mid-30s, hair and clothing indicating the picture must have been taken some time in the late '80s. The photo in the right-hand frame, a more recent one, is of a man in his early '30s.

Not this time, Mom.

DJ tenderly caresses the photo of the man with her thumb.

Not this time, baby.

In the background we hear a noise like little feet stumbling down a staircase.


DJ stows the revolver underneath the recliner just in time for a four-year-old boy, LITTLE DANNY to enter the living room. He is full of energy and enthusiasm but sees something in his mother that gives him pause.

Mommy, I need help tying my shoes-- 
Mommy? Is everything okay?          

DJ gets to her feet and sweeps up the whiskey bottle and ashtray in her hands, turning her back towards her son.

Everything is fine, honey. Mommy has 
to clean up a little. Your aunt      
Stephanie and Mommy's friend Kimmy   
are coming to stay with us for a     
while. They're going to be here any  

I need help tying my shoes so I can 
get ready for school.               

GOD DAMN IT, DANNY! I said I'm busy! 
Go back upstairs and ask your brother
to help you!                         

Ashamed by her outburst and trying to hide her tears, DJ makes a quick break for the kitchen, leaving Little Danny alone in the darkened living room.

How rude!

Cut to opening credit sequence."Everywhere You Look" plays over an aerial shot of Golden Gate Bridge.


Wow! What an opening! We can't wait to experience the hijinks of this new Tanner clan. Reading this, it was almost like we were ten years old again, and all the intervening years of adulthood were just some horrible, soul-crushing nightmare!

Stay tuned to the Scorecard for more breaking news on Fuller House; we're you're one-stop nostalgia shop!

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