Thursday, March 13, 2014

The Walking Dead Season 4, Episode 13

The Walking Dead gets the plot for its newest episode from its own title. How did it score? Best to not ask Daryl...

  • Repeating the ol' "Ignore me zombie, cause I'm just like you!" gambit twice in the same season. = -2pts
  • Zombie fog. Much scarier than this fog. = +5pts
  • Daryl's mysterious new goth hairstyle. = -3pts
  • Setting up a primitive proximity warning system that extends out only as far as your arms can reach. = -10pts
  • Daryl's romantic banter too closely resembling ours....from sixth grade. = -6pts
  • Overtly explainy dialog scenes. = -5pts (-1pt for every scene.)
  • "I like the wings on your vest," officially replaces, "You sure got a pretty mouth," as a southern colloquialism for male rape. = +10pts (For updating a classic.)
  • Daryl process his grief by joining a new group of rednecks lead by this guy. = 0pts (-3pts, for reverting to old habits; +3pts for his ability to recognize a transcendent leader.)
So, yeah, there was a lot of walking. And there was a lot of dead scenes that were devoid of real tension or momentum. All of which culminated in an episode where half of the people in it ended up (pretty much) exactly where they left it. Except for Daryl, who went through a lot of change. No, seriously. He went through a lot of change. His hair alone was at least three different colors and styles throughout the episode. Oh, and he was sad he lost another inappropriately aged GF. 

Poor Daryl!? No, poor us...

Total Score = -11pts
Season Score = +214pts

Score Technician: Sean McConnell 

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